Amy M. Schaefer
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From the Front Porch

I am an "accidental blogger". When I launched my writing career in March of 2014, one of the things that I decided to include was my journaling, which I have always found to be a comforting and therapeutic endeavor.  It was a big risk to open myself up in such a public forum, but it has taught me that, for the most part, we share far more experiences than we think. It's comforting to know I'm not alone!  (*the "Button Text" is the link to my first novel)
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Walking Out of the Tornado

3/28/2016

2 Comments

 
Picture
Me, Dallas, Texas...Christmas 1977
Picture
Me, Saint Patrick's Day, 2016
I sat curled up in the big, black leather chair listening to my daughter laying the groundwork for her future while I caught up on social media. I read random posts and scrolled through various pages until I came across one that said, "This video will change your life." *snorts* I've heard that, seen that claim before, but out of curiosity I clicked on it. Honestly, it was very much like falling down a rabbit hole, as I watched the little girl's story that resonated in so many ways with my own. There were differences, but the essence was the same and hot tears burned my cheeks as she spun her eloquent tale.

"Sometimes someone hurts you so bad, it stops hurting at all. Until something makes you feel again and then it all comes back. Every word. Every hurt. Every moment. How could you understand where I come from? Even if you ask. Even if you listen. Even if you see, you do not really hear, or see, or feel. You won't remember my story. You haven't walked my path. You haven't seen what I've seen." I shook my head, nodding as she spoke those words. She also spoke about how she felt her life was this giant circle, often a tornado, and she didn't know how to get to a place that was safe. She talked about how frequently she had absolutely no choices of her own, as adults around her continued to make "bad" choices for her life. And finally, she talked about being unwanted, unloved, invisible even. Oh how well I remember those feelings, even though they are now, mostly far removed from the world in which I live today. The foster mother she ended up with was a teacher, who showed her love, infinite patience and kindness. She provided a Safe Harbour for the girl, and at one point she tells her, "You don't have to escape from the tornado, you just have to learn how to live inside of it." She also teaches the girl about what to do when she does get the opportunity to "choose" her destiny... (*There is a ReMoved Part 2 where you can see the "end" of her story. It's a little long, but I think it's totally worth the time.)

Her story has a happy ending and thankfully, so does mine. I am still writing my chapters, forging my path. Sometimes it's a convoluted path, full of thorns, big rocks, and uncertainty. But always, always, I choose. I choose the path with the most light, even if it's rocky and perhaps not the easiest option. I choose the path with the most joy, even when it also includes some sorrow. And by doing so, I have walked out of the "tornado" that began my life and into something altogether new! As my little Ensign would say, "It's a good Navy day!"
2 Comments
Yvette Aldrich
3/29/2016 09:06:24 pm

You know that there is so much about our lives that we share. This is one of those parts that I understand about you and your soul. You didn't just walk out of the tornado, you danced and flew my sweet angel! I love you dearly and you brighten my every day.

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Amy Marie Schaefer
3/31/2016 08:43:04 am

I love you, too! I thank God every night in my prayers for having you as a part of my family, my Tribe, my world!

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    About The Author

    I grew up in rural North Carolina. When I was only nineteen, I moved away and became a military wife. My only aspiration at that tender time in my life was to create an adult life that "fixed" all of the "injustices" of my childhood. Secretly, however, I wanted to reach for the sky! I wanted to be a writer and find ways to "save the world" (my mother used to say, "You have Save the World Syndrome".). Mostly, I wanted to matter.

    Since then, I have learned to reach well beyond what I ever dared to think was possible. I've learned not to allow fear to stop me from whatever future I want to create!

    What keeps me grounded? My Tribe! What provides the wind beneath my wings? A well of reserves filled with unstoppable passion!

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  • Amy M. Schaefer, Writer
  • Blog: From the Front Porch
  • Novels
  • Short Stories
    • Children's Books
  • About the Author
  • Contact
  • Photo & Art Gallery