They Don't Teach That in School

Not long ago, my oldest daughter flunked out of college at N.C. State. She is currently working on finding her balance and getting on track and this afternoon, over lunch, we were talking about it. I believe her insights could help a lot of young people to find their own path towards a happy future. This is what she had to say:

Interview with Hannah Schaefer--

What do you think happened that caused you to fail at your college experience?
I wasn't ready. I didn't even know I wasn't ready. Didn't think about it. Everyone else was going and it never entered my mind not to go. And once I flunked out and started applying to jobs, I realized that I could find one without a college degree, but my options were a lot more limited.

What's the hardest thing about being twenty-two and in your position?
I mean the hardest thing, I would say, is the uncertainty...I don't know what kind of job I'll have, what kind of life I'll have. I don't know what kind of money I'll make or what bills I'll have and will my income be enough? It seems like everyone else seems to know, but I don't.

I think more people are in your position than you think. How are you going to get on a path you're secure with?
The first step is going back to school so I can make myself more hire-able.

Do you think high school prepared you for life?
Not really. High school was easy and I didn't have to work. I think they helped me as much as they could have with our school system being the way it is now. They place a lot of emphasis on college, but they don't talk about other options or actually prepare you for what college is going to be like. I mean, in that part, it's all about the teachers. Teachers in AP Courses, and others who know what's coming and what they're doing...they do a great job of pointing you in the right direction but the curriculum, itself, is mostly useless.

What is the biggest mistake you made?
Thinking I wouldn't have to work for it, if I had to boil it down to a nutshell.

What advice would you give to other young people close to your age?
Look at their options. Do they want to go to college? Do the want to take a year off? How will they support themselves? Do they want to join the military or travel? Do they want to go to a trade school? Explore all of the possibilities and learn about what is out there. Your future is your responsibility.

So, have a plan, you think?
Yeah. Something that's not what everyone else is doing. Something they decide for themselves after they know all the options. Don't do something just because your teachers expect you to, or your friends, or parents or whatever. Find what you want, make a plan and pursue that.

And if they don't know what they want?
They don't have to decide right now. There's plenty of time. Do something you enjoy or pick up a hobby and work to support yourself while you're figuring that out.

Many of life's lessons are learned the hard way and most of them can't be taught from a book, or a classroom, or even from parental guidance. Most of the lessons we learn, we must learn through trial and error, success and failure. As a mother, it's not easy to watch your child (even a grown one), take a fall and get hurt, but I know that with my children, as myself, we must learn on our own and win our battles as they come. She will, however, be getting chainmail for Christmas, because one thing's for certain..."Though your battlefield may be different, the need for armor is as real today as it has ever been." ~author Unknown

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