Amy M. Schaefer
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From the Front Porch

I am an "accidental blogger". When I launched my writing career in March of 2014, one of the things that I decided to include was my journaling, which I have always found to be a comforting and therapeutic endeavor.  It was a big risk to open myself up in such a public forum, but it has taught me that, for the most part, we share far more experiences than we think. It's comforting to know I'm not alone!  (*the "Button Text" is the link to my first novel)
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The Making of a Hero

3/21/2016

6 Comments

 
Picture
18 December 2015, the Day She Got Sworn In
My husband raced as fast as he dared to the ER in rural Kansas. It was a snowy night deep in winter and we were losing our baby. I was rushed straight back once we got to the hospital, the ER doc grim as he told me I'd probably abort the baby sometime in the next 24-48 hours. With another little one at home, Brad had to leave me there alone. His pained expression said what his words could not. "I don't want to go but you know I have to," his sad eyes told me. It didn't matter. His work was to protect the life we already had at home, while I waited in fear, mourning the one we were losing.

I was stoic in the dark room, standing at the window watching fat snow fall on the sleeping Kansas city. I picked up the phone and called my father. He answered sleepily on the third ring. "I'm losing the baby," I said on a sob. He was silent for a long time. What could he say? What could he do? He was hundreds of miles away and there were no words of comfort that would ease what I was facing. "It will be okay, girl," he said in his big, gruff voice. I nodded but what else was there to say? We sat in silence on the phone for a long time before he said, "Try to rest and call me if there's any change." "I will," I told him, but I knew I wouldn't 'rest'. I did fall asleep sometime after dawn, but was woken fairly quickly by the voice of my own doctor. "Let's go take a look and see what that baby is doing," he said cheerily. "Wait," I stopped him. "You mean the baby is okay?" He smiled. "Probably, but telling you isn't the same as showing you, so let's have a look."

The ultrasound showed the child I was terrified to bond with, fear of losing her holding me back as hard as I could. But there she was, safe and sound, and it was too late for holding back anymore. I was lost. I prayed as I watched her, begging God not to take her. And he didn't. Five months later, out she came...screaming, healthy and very much alive!

Flash forward almost twenty-three years into the future...and this evening I will pack my bags. Wednesday I will drive to Rhode Island. And Friday, that baby I nearly lost will become an officer in the United States Navy. After she graduates, she will head off to pilot school and learn to fly! My fighter, my defiant, strong-willed, whip-smart little girl has grown into one of my heroes! And really, all I can think to say to that is, God is GOOD!
6 Comments
Angela Miles
3/21/2016 12:10:15 pm

She is just like her mom, strong and strong willed!! Congrats to her and you and Brad. Have a safe trip Wednesday.

Reply
Amy Marie Schaefer
3/21/2016 12:12:55 pm

Thanks, babe! It's difficult to wrap my brain around but I'm SO excited!

Reply
Marie Sabelko
3/21/2016 12:46:21 pm

And there goes my eyes, watering like a sprinkler... Love you! Please be safe in your travels.

Reply
Amy Marie Schaefer
3/21/2016 12:49:00 pm

Love you too, Marie <3 We will, and thank you for all of your support!

Reply
Amy H
3/21/2016 08:17:45 pm

I just can't help but smile. I leave May 10th to see mine receive her badge and Beret. Please continue to hold my hand as we go down this path! I would be lost with out you!

Reply
Amy Marie Schaefer
3/22/2016 01:08:06 pm

Every step of the way, babe. You hold on to mine, I've got yours!

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    About The Author

    I grew up in rural North Carolina. When I was only nineteen, I moved away and became a military wife. My only aspiration at that tender time in my life was to create an adult life that "fixed" all of the "injustices" of my childhood. Secretly, however, I wanted to reach for the sky! I wanted to be a writer and find ways to "save the world" (my mother used to say, "You have Save the World Syndrome".). Mostly, I wanted to matter.

    Since then, I have learned to reach well beyond what I ever dared to think was possible. I've learned not to allow fear to stop me from whatever future I want to create!

    What keeps me grounded? My Tribe! What provides the wind beneath my wings? A well of reserves filled with unstoppable passion!

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  • Amy M. Schaefer, Writer
  • Blog: From the Front Porch
  • Novels
  • Short Stories
    • Children's Books
  • About the Author
  • Contact
  • Photo & Art Gallery