 6 October 2015 I crawled into bed at the ridiculous hour of 9:30 pm (...and no, I'm NOT eighty). I was so tired and certain that falling asleep would be a piece of cake. Instead, I tossed and turned, staring at the clock in the dark every fifteen minutes to half an hour and calculating, "Okay, if I fall asleep by such and such, I'll get x-hours." In between times, my mind zipped from one topic to the next...stupid things, unimportant things that would not stop coming. The dogs had foul gas, so the stench was extremely irritating and every now and then, my husband would start to snore. Get up or wait it out? What to do! I knew I would fall asleep eventually but I wasn't sure if it would be ten minutes before my alarm clock went off or not. Before I finally dozed off, my last thought was, "Tomorrow is going to suck royally."
I'm amazed that no matter how I feel, if I'm cranky from lack of sleep or merely in a grump mood, as soon as I see the little faces of my students, it always turns my mood around. Little humans are tough not to smile back at when they lay on a toothy grin! As I drove home from work today in the early October sunshine (...praise be that the rain has finally stopped), I was thinking about just how much my focus, my outlook completely colours my entire world. No, this is not some epic epiphany, but honestly some of those "pick me up" sayings have become such a cliche' that they seem like meaningless white noise. I often forget that cliches become that way because they almost always contain an element of truth! *smh* My "tomorrow is going to suck royally" didn't come true. Instead, even though I am bone tired today...I am happy. I chose to focus on the tiny humans who are always delighted to see me, eager to read with me, and often hug me before I go. I chose to focus on the courtship text messages my husband sends me all day long to let me know he's thinking about me. And I'm actually looking forward to whatever is on this evening's agenda, although hopefully my family will excuse my frequent, resonating yawns! Change my attitude, change my mood, change my life. Those are the kinds of tomorrows I want in my future and all I have to do is choose to make it so!
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About The Author
I grew up in rural North Carolina. When I was only nineteen, I moved away and became a military wife. My only aspiration at that tender time in my life was to create an adult life that "fixed" all of the "injustices" of my childhood. Secretly, however, I wanted to reach for the sky! I wanted to be a writer and find ways to "save the world" (my mother used to say, "You have Save the World Syndrome".). Mostly, I wanted to matter. Archives
June 2019
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