Amy M. Schaefer
  • Amy M. Schaefer, Writer
  • Blog: From the Front Porch
  • Novels
  • Short Stories
    • Children's Books
  • About the Author
  • Contact
  • Photo & Art Gallery

From the Front Porch

I am an "accidental blogger". When I launched my writing career in March of 2014, one of the things that I decided to include was my journaling, which I have always found to be a comforting and therapeutic endeavor.  It was a big risk to open myself up in such a public forum, but it has taught me that, for the most part, we share far more experiences than we think. It's comforting to know I'm not alone!  (*the "Button Text" is the link to my first novel)
Button Text

Salty Dogs, Mountains, & Mermaids

8/15/2016

3 Comments

 
Picture
The ol' Mountain Man at Kitty Hawk Beach, OBX
I look to the horizon that stretches out in either direction as far as I can see. The sun is sinking on the Soundside behind me, while the waves crash on the sandy shore ahead. Dad and I have arrived without incident to a place we both love...the Outer Banks. Blissfully, I have no memory of being here that causes me pain, and in fact, it is one of those rare places on Earth that seeps Peace and Hope deep down into my bones. During the nearly six hour drive to get here, I sang to my father, danced in the car, and dragged him out of his shell a bit more with each mile. By the time we got here, the smile on his face was genuine, and there was just a glimmer of light in those green eyes. As I watched the water grow dark, I remembered how many people told me to "have fun" on our big "trip", but how does one have fun with the gravity of such an intense situation at hand? I think of the dangerous things that lurk beneath the mesmerizing surface of a sea that will give you joy or kill you depending on the circumstances, and the connections between that and what is happening are not lost on me.

I am determined not to cry for the entirety of the trip and dampen the mood of this trip even the slightest bit, but the second day I break that secret vow, smashing it all to hell. I cannot "unknow" just how possible it is these sights and sounds are some he will never experience again...but maybe he will. I want to have Hope, stay positive and as one day slips into the next, he fishes, and laughs, walks and eats, slowly, vibrantly coming alive again. There is that old man I know, whom I haven't seen in a very long time...he's full of joy and I want to weep and sing and hold tight to the moment forever. I want to bottle up whatever it is that's making him happy, stuff it in my pocket and carry it with me everywhere we go for a time when he might need that salty sea mojo again. By Thursday night, he confesses, "I don't want to go back." "I know," I say. "If I could think of a way to leave you here, I would." He is quiet for so long, I think he's done speaking and then he almost whispers, "Well, at least we have tomorrow." I don't remember the last time I heard him look on the bright side of anything, and I want to fill the ocean with tears, wondering if mermaids know how to sort the happy ones from those filled with sorrow.

Have you ever seen a mountain move? For the first time in my life I know precisely what that would look like. Somewhere in the surf, the salt, among the crabs, stingrays and fishes...that ol' mountain man found his "happy". And now, I pray as hard as I can pray that he'll remember where it is the next time the road he's on becomes rocky or seems insurmountable. Perhaps those mermaids will whisper the secret of it to him in dreams when he needs it.
3 Comments
Janet Hoots
8/15/2016 05:39:26 pm

This is beyond beautiful <3

Reply
Amy Marie
8/15/2016 05:46:25 pm

Thank you! ❤️

Reply
Rob
8/15/2016 10:06:43 pm

I had something in my eyes as I read this because in a lot of ways, I've been where you are with this, and it makes my heart smile to see what you shared with everyone.

The time you spent with your dad and family this past weekend wasn't just fun, it was living for the moment. How many times have you said in your blogs that tomorrow is never guaranteed? We all know this, so when something like this comes about, and you know what lies ahead of you, you seize the moment and make the most of what you have with those who are important to you, be it friends, or in this case, family.

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    About The Author

    I grew up in rural North Carolina. When I was only nineteen, I moved away and became a military wife. My only aspiration at that tender time in my life was to create an adult life that "fixed" all of the "injustices" of my childhood. Secretly, however, I wanted to reach for the sky! I wanted to be a writer and find ways to "save the world" (my mother used to say, "You have Save the World Syndrome".). Mostly, I wanted to matter.

    Since then, I have learned to reach well beyond what I ever dared to think was possible. I've learned not to allow fear to stop me from whatever future I want to create!

    What keeps me grounded? My Tribe! What provides the wind beneath my wings? A well of reserves filled with unstoppable passion!

    Archives

    August 2021
    March 2020
    August 2019
    June 2019
    March 2019
    November 2018
    October 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    May 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    December 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    January 2017
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014

    Categories
    A View From the Hill: Short Stories by Mattie Hill Shields

    All

    Button Text

    RSS Feed

    View my profile on LinkedIn
Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.
  • Amy M. Schaefer, Writer
  • Blog: From the Front Porch
  • Novels
  • Short Stories
    • Children's Books
  • About the Author
  • Contact
  • Photo & Art Gallery