Amy M. Schaefer
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From the Front Porch

I am an "accidental blogger". When I launched my writing career in March of 2014, one of the things that I decided to include was my journaling, which I have always found to be a comforting and therapeutic endeavor.  It was a big risk to open myself up in such a public forum, but it has taught me that, for the most part, we share far more experiences than we think. It's comforting to know I'm not alone!  (*the "Button Text" is the link to my first novel)
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In the Cobwebs, Memories Remain

9/25/2016

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Picture
Picture
I steadfastly sweep off the deck the debris from our weekend project of re-insulating the attic. In the nooks and crannies, between potted herbs and garden gnomes, I think...the two most difficult lessons I've learned in life are this: Not everyone you want is going to love you the way you need to be loved; and some things are ONLY healed with time. Cobwebs catch on the bottom of my broom, much like they do in my brain, holding bits of flotsam in place that would be better lost on some autumn breeze. I pick them off of the gnarled straw ends and release the bits, sending it away. It's easier with my broom...not so much in my head. Why do we hang on to things we know we should let go? Or maybe not everybody does that, only me. Of course, I've thought that before, that I'm the only one and discover quickly enough that is almost never the case, as other voices join my sentiments with resounding, "Me, too's".

I swear, it's just about a daily basis where I view what's going on in the world and wonder what we are doing...what is the point...where is this all going to go? And wherever that is, it can't be good!  It feels as if there is so much toxin, the human race will poison or drown itself in oceans of the stuff. Those are the days I keep my students closest to the forefront of my mind...my students, my girls, my grandchild, my Tribe. I cannot afford to allow my Faith that all will turn out well to fracture into a million pieces, otherwise, what happens to all of them? Somewhere between the potted plants still fragrant with the scent of fresh herbs, I find "the promise". Not long now before colder weather takes the green and smells from all that is close to me, but that won't last forever. If I am patient, hell even if I'm not and worry myself into a frenzy, sooner or later spring WILL come, new growth will happen. I swallow down the fear, gripping tightly to my broom handle in an attempt to hold myself steady, as my part of the "job" is done. Now I do what I'm not so good at doing...I wait. I hope. I have no control over what will unfold, but there is still that tiny seed, that kernel of Faith. That, and a reminder to find the light, cherish the good in each and every day. Take nothing for granted! I am fortunate enough to have a safe roof over my head, good food to eat, and people close to me who care if I wake up tomorrow or not. That makes me pretty rich, even if the whole world goes to hell all around me. I can't control what happens, but I've got that seed in my pocket. So, we'll see.
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    About The Author

    I grew up in rural North Carolina. When I was only nineteen, I moved away and became a military wife. My only aspiration at that tender time in my life was to create an adult life that "fixed" all of the "injustices" of my childhood. Secretly, however, I wanted to reach for the sky! I wanted to be a writer and find ways to "save the world" (my mother used to say, "You have Save the World Syndrome".). Mostly, I wanted to matter.

    Since then, I have learned to reach well beyond what I ever dared to think was possible. I've learned not to allow fear to stop me from whatever future I want to create!

    What keeps me grounded? My Tribe! What provides the wind beneath my wings? A well of reserves filled with unstoppable passion!

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  • Amy M. Schaefer, Writer
  • Blog: From the Front Porch
  • Novels
  • Short Stories
    • Children's Books
  • About the Author
  • Contact
  • Photo & Art Gallery